


30 Years Broken

by quicksilvermalec



Category: Shadowhunters (TV), The Mortal Instruments Series - Cassandra Clare
Genre: 45ish years after QoAaD, Alexander Flame is Alexander Lightwood, Angst, Fluff, I hope it's good???, I'm scared???, M/M, Major character death - Freeform, Reincarnation, Sort Of, Soulmate AU, Tooth-Rotting Fluff, also based on a reincarnation fic, based on a soulmate au prompt, because it's a plot point, but it's not actually a soulmate au, but not really, enjoy?????, it's not gruesome or anything, right at the beginning, shits goin down, that it'll suck???
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2019-05-14
Updated: 2019-05-14
Packaged: 2020-03-04 20:33:57
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: Major Character Death
Chapters: 1
Words: 2,554
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/18820204
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/quicksilvermalec/pseuds/quicksilvermalec
Summary: "You all are probably aware that since the days of Jonathan Shadowhunter, the Nephilim have held in firm belief that those souls who left their bodies were returned to Earth in some other form. Reincarnation, if you will."Jace, who was leaning against a brick pillar with his arms crossed, huffed exasperatedly. "We know the theory. What about it?"Flame smiled. "I'm about to prove it true."***30 years ago, Alec died in battle. Magnus didn't think he'd ever fall in love again... until the High Warlock of Chicago walked into the New York Institute and turned everything upside-down.





	30 Years Broken

**Author's Note:**

> Ooh boy, this is a rollercoaster ride. I'm afraid it's gonna suck, but only time will tell. Totally un-beta'd. Enjoy!

30 years ago, Alec died in battle.

The rest of them, the ones who lived, can't seem to get over it. The pain got duller, but it never got better.

They mention him every day, just to keep him on their minds.

Magnus barely talks anymore, to anyone except Clary, Izzy, and Jace.

He doesn't see the point.

***

They needed Magnus at the New York Institute. Of course they did. Nephilim - you could teach them everything, but they'd still be completely incompetent when they needed their wits the most. Magnus rolled his eyes at the fire message and sighed, waving a lazy hand to open a Portal to the Institute.

He stepped through it and Clary visibly relaxed as she noticed him. "Hey, Magnus. We need your help with-"

"It's the ex," Magnus told her flippantly. She blinked.

"What?"

"It's always the ex, when it comes to murder." Clary looked at him for a moment, then laughed. She had finally realized that he was joking. He strolled up to her side and bent over the notes she'd been looking at. They started to discuss a few things in hushed tones, but they hadn't gotten anywhere when Izzy showed up.

"Hey, guys, my CI just called in and told me that they found a vamp murdering mundanes in Manhattan and he brought him in. He's downstairs, actually, helping restrain the guy, I'm not sure... why he's here, but he's here."

Clary looked incredulous. "You have a Confidential Informant for this case?"

Izzy rubbed the back of her neck sheepishly. "Yeah, well... he started as an anonymous call-in and eventually I recognized his voice every time he called and offered him protection in exchange for being my CI, so here we are. I've never actually met him, just talked over the phone."

Whatever else either of them had to say on the matter was cut off by the arrival of Jace, who came down the stairs behind Magnus and joined their group. "What'd I miss?" he asked. Izzy made a sign-language  _h_ in front of her chest and Magnus stifled a laugh, but Clary picked up her file and said, "well, Isabelle just solved our murder. I guess we're back to killing demons."

"Clary, we're too old for that shit," Izzy reminded her.

"I'm not," said Jace, forever reminding everyone that he was stronger and cooler and in every way  _better_ than them.

Then another figure showed up, this time coming down the hall behind Izzy. The man was tall and thin, but with defined muscles showing under his tight shirt. Magnus was the only one facing that direction, so he elbowed Izzy until she looked up. "Who's that? I've never seen him here before."

"Neither have I," Izzy said. "Maybe he's my CI." Magnus shrugged.

But as the man neared them, he slowed, staring straight at Magnus. "You- you're here," he said, sounding awed.

Magnus furrowed his brows. "Um... do I know you?" he asked gently.

The beautiful look of joy on the man's face melted into a mask of polite professionalism. "Mm, perhaps not," he replied amicably. "But I know you. Magnus Bane, High Warlock of Alicante."

Magnus nodded. "Indeed. And you are...?"

The man held out a hand. "Alexander Flame, High Warlock of Chicago, at your service."

Magnus took it and shook it once. "Lovely to meet you."

Throughout the entire interaction, their three companions had been looking back and forth between them like they were watching the ball at an extremely interesting tennis game. But now, Flame turned to the others and surveyed them studiously.

Almost to himself, he murmured, "you all look the same. It's so interes- wait. Where's Simon?"

Izzy looked surprised. "You know Simon?"

Flame blushed a light pink high on his cheekbones. "After the Mortal War I took note of the f- six of you, but I only started to really follow what you had achieved after the Cold Peace was dissolved by Magnus here and his husband. Simon always intrigued me, but I've been out of the loop for about thirty years, and Simon isn't here."

Jace averted his gaze. "Simon died a few years back. Vampire attack." He couldn't seem to bring himself to say anything else about it.

Flame took a deep breath, processing that information, then turned back to Magnus. "You asked if you knew me. To be fair, we've met, but you do meet a lot of people and I'm not particularly interesting so I'd be surprised if you remembered me."

Magnus gave him a scrutinizing look. "I would remember meeting you, I know I would." It came out much closer to the way he used to talk to Alec than he'd intended.

Flame shrugged casually. "Perhaps."

Clary laughed abruptly. "You sound like a Seelie." Flame turned to look at her. She clarified, "Alec said something once about how Seelies say 'perhaps' when they want to hide something."

He hummed in comprehension, nodding. "Oh yes, I know all about the famed Alec Lightwood. I know this is rather extensively belated, Magnus, but I am very, very sorry for your loss."

Magnus avoided his gaze. "I'm over it."

Flame shook his head. "No you're not. You never get over losing the person you married, the person you swore to dedicate your entire life to. You never really get through that. It's too painful, and it's too painful for the rest of your life."

Magnus looked at him in surprise, opening his mouth to say something, but Jace cut him off, having regained his composure, and his suspicion of everyone. "Well, this has been an enlightening conversation, but I'm sure you're here for a reason. Why don't you get to the point?"

Flame smiled at him with a fondness that suggested more intimacy than there should have been, and then the expression vanished, replaced with one of resignation and a vaguely pained look. "Could we not talk about this in the middle of the Institute? I'd prefer to return to my apartment in Chicago, if that's alright with you."

The four of them shared a suspicious look, but they all agreed. Flame turned to create the Portal and Magnus took this moment to really look at him. His skin was pale, but not so pale as Isabelle's - he was quite obviously Latino - and his limbs were long, but muscled. He was slightly taller than Magnus, and his hair... well, his hair was something else entirely. It was messy, and dark brown, but only at the roots. Most of his hair was colored a light orange, and the tips were bright red. Like fire. Like Flame. Magnus wondered if he'd done that on purpose. He also wondered what the meaning behind his first name was.

Flame turned back and smiled at them, gesturing toward the Portal. Magnus smiled and stepped through it. Flame followed with Clary, Izzy, and Jace in tow. He strolled right past Magnus to a large window and threw back the drapes that hid it. "Oh, home. How I've missed you."

Magnus looked around and realized that Isabelle was also staring around at the loft with an expression of mixed awe and disgust on her face. Magnus was the first to speak.

"This is... a near-perfect replica of my loft in Brooklyn. I've been really patient so far, but that's kind of creepy."

Flame turned in surprise to look at Magnus. It seemed to take him a moment to get over his immediate reaction, but once he had, he smiled and laughed. "I'm not stalking you, Magnus, I promise. You'll understand later."

"Then explain," Clary told him sharply. He took it in stride, nodding.

"Okay... you all are probably aware that since the days of Jonathan Shadowhunter, the Nephilim have held in firm belief that those souls who left their bodies were returned to Earth in some other form. Reincarnation, if you will."

Jace, who was leaning against a brick pillar with his arms crossed, huffed exasperatedly. "We know the theory. What about it?"

Flame smiled. "I'm about to prove it true."

Everyone stared at him. Magnus scoffed. "That theory is like religion. There's no real way to prove that it's true and no real way to prove that it's not. How do you propose to make us believe one way or the other?"

Flame looked at him with a softness in his eyes that caught Magnus off-guard so much he was rendered temporarily breathless. "Oh, Magnus," he murmured, bringing a hand up to caress his cheek with one finger. "I love you. I love you more than anything."

Magnus slapped his hand away. "Don't  _touch_ me!" he almost shouted. "I don't know you!"

Flame took a large step away from him. "Of course," he muttered. "That was over the line. I'm- I'm sorry."

Magnus took a look around the room, then took a deep breath. "That's it. That is officially too much for me. I'm leaving."

"No, Magnus, wait!" Flame cried, lunging forward like a lion and grabbing his arm. "Please, just... hear me out."

Magnus wrenched his arm out of the other warlock's grip and gritted his teeth. He took a deep breath and turned around. "You have thirty seconds. I'll bite. How are you going to prove the Shadowhunters' bullshit reincarnation conspiracy theory to be true?" He said this last so deadpan that he almost made himself cringe.

Flame sighed. "Something like this." He snapped his fingers. His magic was a beautiful forest green and it smelled like foam off the ocean. The dark green fire seemed to eat him alive, and when it dissipated, there was another, far more familiar person standing in front of Magnus, with his head bowed.

"I'm sorry," he murmured. "I didn't want to lie to you, but if the Clave in Alicante - or even the Clave-in-Exile - found out about this, they'd pull me apart until they'd tortured me to death."

Isabelle was the only one who seemed to be able to speak.

" _Alec_?" she cried, in a voice that held all of the pain and anguish she'd carried for thirty years, since her brother had died to save her. The man looked up then, and Magnus could see the bright blue eyes he'd fallen in love with back in 2007.

"I've been wearing that glamour for 25 years, since my powers manifested. When I was four, my warlock mark showed up, my magic started to come, and all the memories came with it. I remember  _everything_ that happened to me in my last life. I remember growing up with the two of you-" he gestured to Jace and Izzy "-and I remember meeting you and Simon-" he pointed at Clary "-and I remember our entire twisted, confusing love story," he finished, looking at Magnus hopelessly. "I've missed you so much," he murmured, and his voice was so quiet and broken that Magnus felt his heart shatter.

His throat was so dry. He hadn't believed he'd ever fall in love again, after Alec gave his life. He hadn't thought there would be anyone ever again. And now that he was here, looking at Magnus with so much remorse and so much love-

"I don't believe you," he croaked. Alec stared at him.

"Magnus, I- 25 years, I have spent waiting, wishing that I could come back to you, hiding myself in a replica of your loft so as to have some small connection to you because this was my  _home_ , and you... you don't believe me?" He looked as though he was ready to kill himself. "Magnus..." He took a deep breath, then swallowed, then said, "ask me anything. Anything about- about before. I'll tell you."

Jace was the first who spoke. "What did you say to me about your father in the demon realms?"

Maybe-Alec smirked. "'Of course he likes you,'" he quoted. "'You're heterosexual and have low expectations of father figures.'" He turned to Izzy. "I planned your  _quinceanera_ , do you remember? I bought your dress. It was white with silver lace around the bottom and the collar. I had it fitted to you. I did everything because it was your day. You were my only little sister, and you deserved to be spoiled." Isabelle's eyes were glistening.

"I remember," she whispered.

He turned to Clary. "We never had any real meaningful moments together, but I just... you were always sort of like a second Izzy to me. You were like my sister. I just could never actually  _tell_ you that." Clary looks as if she's in shock.

Maybe-Alec looked at Magnus. "When you broke up with me, you said 'aku cinta kamu' and I asked you what it meant. You said, 'it means I love you. More than I thought I would. Not that that changes anything.'"

"Magnus," Jace whispered, awed. "It's him."

Magnus looked at him sharply. "How do you know?"

Maybe-Alec was looking at Jace with an unreadable expression. "I can feel him," the blond replied, his mouth hanging slightly open.

"'Entreat me not to leave thee', Jace," Maybe-Alec whispered. "And 'aught but death'. I swore. And I told you I'd always come back. Here I am?"

Magnus still wasn't convinced, and Maybe-Alec could obviously see that. "You know, Magnus, if you still don't believe me, there's one foolproof way you can check," he suggested, smirking, his arms spread wide.

Magnus picked up on what he was suggesting almost immediately and felt his face flush. He didn't believe that this was his Alec, but at the same time... what if he was wrong? What if this warlock was telling the truth? What if... what if his Alexander really was standing in front of him? He wanted to find out.

So he took a step forward, then another, then another, and then he was standing in front of Maybe-Alec. He took a deep breath, then placed a hand at the back of his neck and pulled his mouth down to connect with his own.

He wasn't lying. It was Alec. Alec was the only person who did  _this_ when he kissed Magnus. He was the only one who knew all the right things to do to take Magnus apart a tiny bit at a time and then put him back together, to make him lightheaded and dizzy and not know what he was trying to do. And he was here.

And he was alive.

And he was  _alive_.

Magnus let him go. "I missed you, Alexander," he murmured. Alec smiled.

"I missed you so much. You have no idea what the last 25 years have been like. I knew you were alive and I knew exactly where you were but I couldn't come see you because you wouldn't believe me and even though I'd expect it, it would still completely crush me. Every day I could feel so keenly the pain of losing you, of knowing I could go to you but I also couldn't. It would have been easier if you'd been dead, because then I could've mourned and moved on. But instead I just felt your absence like glass in my chest. I missed you. I love you, Magnus."

Magnus looked up at him with a feeling akin to hope blooming in his ribs. "It's you. You're back. You're alive."

And Alexander hugged him and everything was suddenly okay.

**Author's Note:**

> So now Alec is immortal and they can stay together forever and it's just adorable. I love y'all, thanks for reading!


End file.
